Before They Join Faith and Fraternities

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

Alright, Sacred Greeks family, welcome back! If you’re new here, I’m Dr. Lyman Montgomery and, whew, Janet, I feel like this episode needs to be in every church foyer, every group text thread right now. We get these questions all the time, don’t we?

Janet

Oh, absolutely, Dr. Montgomery. Every homecoming, every graduation season—somebody’s mama or youth leader corner me with that look. “Janet, is this Greek stuff really about God?” And you know, Lyman, it’s like folks forget where these organizations came from. Y’all, if you’re listening and you’re anxious about your baby pledging—let’s take it back a second.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

Yes, let's! See, BGLOs weren’t just thrown together for fun or fashion. We’re talking early 1900s—our folks weren’t even allowed in those big white institutions, not even in their classrooms, let alone their social clubs. These organizations? They were a lifeline. They created spaces of belonging and purpose, not as a substitute for the church, but as a way to lift each other up—academically, socially, even spiritually.

Janet

And I mean, let’s not gloss over those spiritual roots. You look at people like Dr. King, Rosa Parks—these are giants in our faith and history, and they wore their letters with pride. It’s not just about step shows and colors. It’s service, justice, loving your neighbor—sound familiar, church folk? That legacy is what I always try to remind our parents and pastors about.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

That’s right, Janet. I’ll tell y’all—back when I first wanted to pledge Phi Beta Sigma, my mother was worried. Like, genuinely worried. She’d heard all those stories—secret oaths, rituals she didn’t understand. It wasn’t until I started digging into the stories of our founders, those Christian men who prayed together, who marched for civil rights—my parents began to see how faith was woven right into the foundation. Knowing that history eased their hearts—and mine, honestly.

Janet

You know, Dr. M, history doesn’t erase every concern, but it helps folks see the bigger picture. Like you say, it’s testimony not theory. Church, let’s learn before we assume.

Janet

Now, we gotta talk about what happens after those letters get pinned—right? Let’s be real, not every Greek experience is the same, and not every organization will make a child stronger in their faith. So for parents, for mentors, the question isn’t just “What do they join?” but “Who are they becoming?”

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

Exactly! Are you seeing real growth, or maybe some compromise? And listen, we said this in one of the early episodes: it’s not about painting every org with the same brush. Look at the fruit. I’ve witnessed, again and again, students who found a deeper walk with Christ and purpose because they were part of a BGLO. They became servant-leaders, held each other accountable, and multiplied their impact through faith-based community service. Of course, sometimes, things go left—but that’s where guidance comes in.

Janet

Mmhmm. Let me give y’all an example. I mentored a young sister—let’s call her Keisha—who pledged Zeta at Fort Valley State. Now her mama was worried, but Keisha didn’t miss church. In fact, she ended up teaching Sunday school and was volunteering with her sorority on Saturdays. That girl balanced rituals with righteousness. And I saw her friends, Greek and non-Greek, start volunteering too, just off her witness. It wasn’t always easy—but that accountability was priceless for her walk. That’s the good fruit I’m talking about.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

Yeah, Janet, that’s the testimony side. And also—you know, sometimes folks join, thinking Greek life will solve all their issues, only to struggle with pressure, or start drifting from church. It happens. That’s why we never stop asking: what kind of person are you becoming? Are you still grounded? Or are you wandering?

Janet

Exactly—and if you see your child’s light dimming, don’t run straight to judgment. There could be so much going on beneath the surface. Be the steady presence, not the spotlight they wanna run from.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

So now, let’s get practical. If you’re a parent, pastor, or youth leader listening in—breathe. Wisdom beats fear every time. Before you try to talk your child out of pledging, take a moment. Be curious, not confrontational. Ask questions like, “What draws you to this organization?” or “How do you see your faith fitting in?” That conversation does more than any argument ever could.

Janet

Lord, yes. Rushing in with “that’s not of God!” or “you’re gonna lose your salvation”—child, that’ll get the door slammed real quick! Spend some time in prayer, read up—get the facts straight. And if you need a starting place, Dr. M, your book “Sacred, Not Sinful” is just what the doctor ordered. No scare tactics, just wisdom. I tell people—get educated before you get opinionated.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

I appreciate that, Janet. I wrote “Sacred, Not Sinful” for folks who, like my folks back in Ohio, had these questions but felt like church didn’t want to hear them. And that’s why Sacred Greeks Skool exists, too—nobody’s here to force you, to recruit or scare you off. We’re just bringing clarity. If you’ve felt misunderstood by church folks or family, you’re not alone. I’ve been there—painful as it was, those honest conversations are how we grow.

Janet

And I’ll add this: lean into trusted mentors who’ll pray with you, not just pray about you. Walk with your child, don’t chase 'em with fear. I promise, that approach builds bridges—not fences.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

Absolutely. Well, y’all, as we wrap this one up, just remember—lead with love, seek wisdom, and don’t be afraid to ask hard questions, but ask 'em with an open heart. And hey, if you need more resources, check out Sacred Greeks Skool or grab a copy of “Sacred, Not Sinful”—we’re here to walk this thing out together. Janet, any final words before we let ‘em go?

Janet

Oh, just keep walking in truth, family. Whether your child joins or not, they need your prayers, your trust, and your example more than any opinion. We’re always learning and loving right along with y’all. Dr. M, thanks for having the courage to lead these convos.

Dr. Lyman Montgomery

Thank you, Janet, and Sacred Greeks fam—we’ll see you next time. Keep letting your letters shine for the Kingdom. Take care now!

Janet

Bye y’all—see you next time!